life is too short to not tell dad jokes


anything robert de niro touches is a cinematic masterpiece tbh


australiansanta:

i apologise to every puppy that i havent patted yet and i’ll be there soon pal


tybaltcapuletsbitch:

modern au were the Capulets and Montagues decide to settle their differences once and for all at Family Feud


In the delivery room

tokomon:

mother: is it a boy or a girl?

doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor


nosdrinker:

micklovich:

this is the single most pretentious thing ive ever seen in my life im gonna vomit

I will fight everyone who goes to see this movie


vadersault:

"why do you need 500 dollars for clothes?"image

no reason 


Everyone has it, but no one can lose it. 


paleblogdad:

US president vince mcmahon committing an act of war in the UN

image

world president vince mcmahon walking into the UN after winning WWIII

image


get to know me meme: [2/5] tv shows - friday night lights (2006)

"Every man, at some point in his life, is gonna lose a battle. He is gonna fight and he is gonna lose. But what makes him a man, is that in the midst of that battle, he does not lose himself. This game is not over. This battle is not over. So let’s hear it one more time, together: Clear eyes, full hearts…"